Living in Clips

Such a cliché blog title I know, but I am going somewhere with this one. So, let me explain the irony in the title … I think it has been around 2 months since I bought these magnificent and more importantly deliciously comfortable Céline Pull On trainers and I feel amazing in them. I mean just look at that thick soft padded leather, beautiful stitching and thick rubber sole … OK! I know they are an acquired taste, even I will admit that.

It was only just over a year ago when I didn’t own any pieces from one of my favourite Parisian lux fashion brands Céline and to be honest I never really thought I ever would. That was until I discovered the many ways to introduce lux brands like Céline into your wardrobe at discount prices, that don’t involve buying a fake … I will be covering more detail on all that on the blog in the coming posts but for now I will be talking about my most comfortable shoes to date. Which by the way I conveniently bought on Instagram ? from a very trustworthy lady who was selling them through a beautiful gallery space in Amsterdam.

Anyway, like I said it’s been around 2 months since I added these beautiful trainers to my collection of lux clothing – I bought them with the intention of adding some really high-end comfortable footwear for every(other)day wear. Yet truth be told they haven’t been much outside the box let alone outside the house.

I have given myself two fairly valid reasons to justify why that is, which I wanted to share with you.

Firstly, I asked myself if perhaps it is because these trainers were a little more expensive than your average lux trainers even at 50% off and I’m saving them for fairer weather or perhaps more special outings.

However, after reading Matt’s last article so aptly titled “it’s a state of mind” which is when I really admitted that my fear of wearing these new trainers outside was something so much more than saving them for the right occasion, it’s because of my current state of mind.

I can’t really remember the last time I dressed up well here in Paris and that wedding outfit doesn’t count. Yet, there is nothing that gives me more confidence than taking the time to get well dressed, from head to toe, right down to my scent. I must admit I think I have a fantastic wardrobe of really beautiful statement pieces and beautiful high quality clothing for everyday wear for every Season.

Yet, on current rotation here in Paris are my Nike trainers, scruffy cut off Acne jeans, an old t-shirt from my days in high school, a well worn-in knit, and a cord Mambo jacket which I’ve also revived from my high school closet, unkempt hair, and not even a hint of eyebrow gel in sight. At one point I wouldn’t have ever dared leave the house without my eyebrow gel and my under eye concealer. This current rotation doesn’t have me feeling any confidence as I rush around the City day in day out with my head hanging low (you have to look out for the dog poo of course). With nearly all my wearable and confidence building wardrobe now gathering dust in our home-away-from-home in Scotland because quite frankly I have resigned to the fact that I will never wear these things in Paris again.

A bit of a big claim you might think? You blog about fashion and Paris is one of the most beautiful cities in the world you might add? All very valid points indeed but what has changed? I think I have certainly changed but right now I am looking for the biggest change of all!

I’m feeling disconnected and suffocated, I feel like life is on pause while I search for something better. Paris is tainted in ways I wonder if they are really worth fighting for. Sure this city might be one of the most architecturally beautiful in the world but that’s far from the stark reality we live through here each day. The city is stunning there is no doubt about that but it’s busy, unfriendly, tough and I have to say pretty filthy. Instagram photos of all the best spots in Paris and those filters have us fooled into thinking otherwise of course. To anyone who walks this city and sees it otherwise; I would love to walk in your shoes (but then they are probably Céline, right?).

While we certainly enjoy the most incredible opportunities and places Paris has to offer. Exploring exciting gallery shows and museums, window shopping is always a feast for the eyes, wining and dining at the most incredible restaurants and bars where food tastes like nothing else I’ve ever tasted … but all this comes at a pretty high price. Which usually involves a tiny apartment where there is little room to stand up straight let alone evolve and breathe, surrounded by negative energies from the dysfunctional relationships that invade your home and seep in through the walls, along with the mice … It’s not all bad of course but like I said it’s tainted and I must find my way.

I miss the confident woman I use to be, I miss the comforts of friendly faces and calmer (greener) spaces. I want to walk with my head held high, I want to not only own the clothes I walk in but own the streets I walk through … I want to evolve.

That might be one of the longest and most revealing posts so far but I wanted to share those thoughts with you because it’s been a difficult transition into Winter this year sartorially and emotionally speaking and I would love to hear your positive thoughts on how you get through the Winter blues in Paris or wherever you may be in the world.

As for me and my new trainers don’t worry about us … we will enjoy the streets together someday, I just can’t tell you where that will be yet.